Confessions

I am not so sure that babysitting/caring for my friend’s child is working out for me. I am not sure I want to be a care-giver. I am sure that I am not looking forward to September when it goes from 3 days a week to 5 full days a week.

Does this make me a bad person? I hope not. But my friend’s child is driving me crazy. He is a few months younger than my son Aidan and can be very clingy. It isn’t that Aidan can’t be that way, but he is my child and usually a few minutes of cuddling and maybe a couple of minutes of breastfeeding and he is good to go. Of course this isn’t possible with my friend’s child. (Well the cuddling is, but that doesn’t seem to work as well as it does for Aidan.)

He is also a thrower of things. I am pretty sure this is because my friend and her husband taught the boy to throw a ball early on. No rolling the ball for them. Throwing. Now this means that now he throws balls, toys, anything that he can pick up. I have tried really hard with Aidan to not throw things. Even balls. Especially since very soon they will be told in no uncertain terms “Don’t play with that basketball/baseball/soccerball in the house, you will break something!” I have been trying to be a little subtle with the different rules that they have for their son, but I am thinking that I will have to be clear very soon that throwing things is one of my absolutely not rules.

Now don’t get me wrong about this, I really like the boy. I am just not ready to have two little boys so close in age, but on totally different schedules, in my house almost full time. There are times when they are playing along side each other and my son isn’t taking the toys from my friend’s child that I think this may not be so bad. Then there are times like today when it is now 1:15 and I might be able to get some breakfast. {sigh.} I guess that I just have to hope that the bilingual daycare has a spot that opens up in January. (That is the earliest age that they would take my friend’s son.) Though maybe in a few weeks I will have them on a similar schedule and we can start doing things again, then things might be good, great even.

In the meantime, please tell me I am not a bad person, and that there is hope for things to get better.

3 comments to Confessions

  • Kathy - Mother-in-law

    Gwen you are certainly NOT a bad person. It takes a lot of adjusting to someone else’s child on a full time basis. Everyone has different rules. Remember Robbie’s boys!!!! Thought I would give you that flashback. Keep on truckin.

    Love Mother in Law

  • It takes way more than just this to make you a bad person! You need to do more, try more, be baaaad.

    I think what may help you is if you iron out some expectations now with your friend. Just like a regular daycare has discipline and policies for the daycare, so shall you, but somewhat less formal. Write down some of the things you think need clarifying and approach it from the perspective you have stated of “I’d like to make sure our children remain safe when they are in my care so why don’t we both establish some guidelines we feel good about? If we do this now, we might not have to worry later about any kind of miscommunication or misunderstanding and this in turn will avoid anyone’s feelings getting hurt unintentionally.”

  • Kathy and Devra, thanks for the validation. I think I am slowly figuring things out and how to make any rules that I need positive for all parties involved. I am still not looking forward to the full time, but I don’t think my friend is either.