Should I or Shouldn’t I?

Please help! If there are any lurkers I need your comments.

I have written a post about my stepmother. It was cathartic and I needed to write it. Now I just need to know if I should post it.

I haven’t named my stepmother and it is very unlikely that she will ever find my blog let alone read it. The post isn’t mean, and my husband doesn’t think that it is too harsh considering what she did. I am obviously of two minds as to whether or not to publish this post. I would like to get all these things off my chest and it is probably better that I don’t burden my father with this. It is also extremely unlikely that he will read the post either.

I also think that if I publish this post that I will feel a hundred times better. Just having it on my computer as a draft has helped but I know that having it on my blog will take another full load off. That is a huge part of the reason that I started a blog other than my family blog. I needed a place to write things that are not always warm and fuzzy. Our family blog is a way to let the people back home see some of the changes in Aidan that they miss living on the very other side of the country. This blog is a way for me to get things off my chest. It is not always nice and cute, (though sometimes it is) and has already made being a SAHM better. I feel more connected with other people even if I don’t exactly know who those people are.

So connect people, should I publish the post or should I delete it, or should I keep it on my dashboard ready if I feel the need? Help me please.

5 comments to Should I or Shouldn’t I?

  • OK, first off: LOVE the new header image:) I need a nice long bath…

    I would probably not post it, if she or someone who knows her reads the family blog, because I think that they both show up on your profile so peeps who read family blog could easily find gwen blog. If I was a family member I’d read it out of curiosity. I had this same dilemna about blogging my relationship with my dad. I decided not to. He doesn’t know about the blog, but I use my real name and I just don’t wanna chance it. Hopefully the act of writing the post was cathartic. Post it if you feel you need to, but I would think it’s a risk. Hope everything’s ok.

  • Heidi, thanks about he header. My husband Anthony took the pictur the other day and stayed up way to late working on it. I love it too and I don’t usually say that about pictures of me.

    Thank you for your thoughts on the to post or not to post. I am thinking that I will just keep it on the dashboard for a while. I am ok, it is just another wrinkle with the woman who married my dad. I just wish that she could leave the drama, become more secure in her marriage and not take her insecurities out on my family.

    Maybe we should start an anonymous blog for confessions of a parent dealing with their parents. What do you think? :)

  • mimi

    First off I would also like to say that I love that picture of you. You are such a beautiful person Gwen inside and out.

    Secondly I hope that you dont mind that I have found and am reading this. I am enjoying reading my sisters thoughts. I am proud to have you as my sister.

    Thirdly, I fully support you in whatever you decide, to post or not to post. There is a chance that it will come back and bite you and me both in the ass but so be it. If you need to get it out, get it out. I know myself that I have had to write it out. I often write letters to people, though tend not to actually send them. It helps getting it out and writing all your feelings down. Purges them, keeping them from festering in your belly.

    Perhaps an anonymous blog for dealing with ones parents would be a wise idea. I know that I myself would be tempted at times to use such a thing, despite not as of yet being a parent myself.

    Anyway, know that you made me feel so much better the other day and that I love you very much and am looking so so forward to seeing you and the little man in a few weeks.
    Love Mimi

  • Maybe part of you actually wants the stepmother to find and read it? (Hence the urge to hit “publish.”)

    You could put it up for a few days, get some responses, then delete. I had a post I planned to do that with (venting about some former students) – and the day I went to delete it, I found out that I had been linked by a big-time website who had sent over 400 readers to that very post.

    So yeah. Maybe just leave it on the Dashboard.

  • Write it, print it out, put it on a corkboard and throw darts at it, and then shred it and throw it away. :-) i neeeeeeeeeeeeeever badmouth anyone on my blog no matter how tiny the chances are that they’ll ever find it… because you know that if anyone related to her ever DOES find it, then they’ll immediately go back and read the whole thing (that’s what I did when I found my neighbor’s blog!) and they’ll see it. And once you publish it, you can’t retract it – it’s cached somewhere on the net forever.