Sometimes He Breaks My Heart

I love my son so much even when he does something that he knows he is not supposed to. I know that is a given with most parents, but I thought it might need to be said, at least for myself.

One rule he knows and continues to push is the “We only draw on paper.” (Thank god for washable crayons.) Aidan loves to draw and sometimes he will not wait until we get the paper out for him and he draws on whatever takes his fancy. The TV for example. (Yes we are very happy that we do not have an LCD TV right at the moment.) I did get it all off the TV screen but there still is a bit on the side speaker. This leads me to today.

Now most of the time Aidan will decide to draw and he brings the paper and whatever drawing accessory he want to the coffee table and his little chair. Today was no exception. Aidan told me he was going to use the Alphabet (stencil) and draw on the paper. And he did.

I was trying to put the cover back on the sofa and it was taking too long in this little boy’s estimation. I actually agree that it was taking too long but I had just washed it so it needed to stretch a bit and be smoothed over the couch. I was moving the fabric over the arm and Aidan came by with an open purple marker and drew a half circle on the side of the arm. I looked at him said “No,” very sharply “I just washed it! You know we don’t draw on anything but paper.” Aidan burst into tears and threw himself in my arms. After about 5 minutes of full out crying he says very tearfully “Not bad anymore. Not bad anymore.” This shot me right through the heart because he was so upset. I told him that I wasn’t angry, we just needed to remember that we only draw on paper. He then said, while still crying “Mommy not angry anymore.”

It is so hard to discipline Aidan when he is so volatile and gets upset when you tell him no. I am just so glad that for the most part he is a very well behaved boy. I don’t think my heart could take the strain of breaking so many time a day as I tell him not to do something and he cries like his heart is broken.